Antoinette’s Story
Antoinette and her husband Henry were together for fifty-four years before he died at St Joseph’s Hospice in September 2022. Read their story in Antoinette’s words below.
Henry and I were together for fifty four years. He was my teenage crush!
Henry was a palliative care patient at St Joseph’s Hospice from May to September 2022. It was overwhelming when we first arrived in the Hospice. But the doctors, nurses, catering team, cleaning team and everyone who works there made us feel so welcome, and really looked after us. Even though he was ill, Henry wasn’t miserable. He was known as ‘Daddy’, or ‘Papa’ on the ward – he became more of a relative than a patient.
The staff really looked after him and were doing everything possible for Henry to be comfortable and have a lovely end of life. Little attentions made a difference, like how they were holding and rubbing his hands until the end.
When Henry died, St Joseph’s Hospice comforted my family, and help was offered to me and the kids.
I knew I needed it sooner rather than later. I didn’t know how to cope with the future. Being with my soulmate for 54 years, and then learning to live without him was scary.
I couldn’t face being in the house by myself. I would only go home to eat, sleep and shower. I don’t know what I would have done without counselling. My sessions with my St Joseph’s Hospice counsellor really helped. I felt like I was coming to see a friend, not a counsellor.
For me now, the Hospice is a home away from home. It has been my sanctuary to come back to each week. I feel like the staff have become part of my family! They recognise you, and say hi to you, and ask how you are doing.
Henry being in the Hospice, and the treatment he got, is the reason why I wanted to support St Joseph’s Hospice, and join the Flowers of Celebration campaign. He had a beautiful end of life because they made it possible.
Pictured: Antoinette in the St Joseph’s Hospice gardens
I bought a Flower of Celebration in 2023 to celebrate Henry’s life, and attended the opening of the Garden of Celebration with my daughters and grandson.
The Garden of Celebration event was a day I will never forget as long as I live. Even though it was raining, I would not have missed it for anything! The sunshine came when we arrived in the garden, and I felt like it was a sign from Henry.
It was a beautiful day of celebration, and we ended up chatting with other families who were there to celebrate their loved ones about how the Hospice supported us. Even families and friends who lost a loved one years ago dedicated a flower. It was very comforting how we all came together for this day of celebration.
The flower I bought is in a special vase in our front room. Everyone who comes to the house can see the flower next to Henry’s photo. It’s the first thing you see when you enter. Looking at it every day is a reminder of the celebration of Henry’s life. It’s a forever reminder of the beautiful husband I had.
There is still time to purchase your Flower of Celebration for 2024, and RSVP to the opening of the Garden of Celebration which will take place on Saturday 10th August.